Worst Things To Happen On Your Wedding Day

Your suggestions

• Upon going to bridal suite you find your new father-in-law in bed with your mother.
  David Grimm [5 Mar 2005]
• You realise you've accidentally married the best man, who IS Camilla Parker-Bowles!
  Cyn Icle [5 Mar 2005]
• You suddenly realise that you forgot to put on you suit and find yourself in your underwear like what always happens in your dreams
  Agentguy The Sheep [5 Mar 2005]
• at the bachelor party, the Husband-to-be eats the entire cake before being told that there was a stripper in it.
  A to the C [8 Mar 2005]
• At the bachelor party, the husband-to-be eats the entire cake before being told that there was a stripper in it.
  A to the C [8 Mar 2005]
• The Bride goes down the isle tellin gpeople in the pews to call her
  Big Fish [8 Mar 2005]
• When you finally realise the reason your partner always rented the 'Crying Game'
  Darth Scratch n Sniff [11 Mar 2005]
• Just before the ceremony ends terrible parasitic aliens invade earth and live in our eyes. They make us live in water-filled holes in the ground with no shoes on and nowhere to sit.
  Karl Bolton [11 Mar 2005]
• As you're sobering up and see your bride to be walking down the isle, you realise that marrying a 200kg biker called Bubba isn't as great an idea as it was last night when your mates in the pub dared you.
  Capt Nemo [14 Mar 2005]
• You realise that your "Russian Bride" is actually a yeti that has been shaved down and taught to walk.
  Capt Nemo [15 Mar 2005]
• George Bush discovers that you've been hidin weapons of mass distruction in the trunk of your car the whole time and decides to choose the moment just before you say "I do" to make his presence known (with 40 ICBMs). He's a real bastard in that way.
  Capt Nemo [15 Mar 2005]
• My father walking in on the service. I have never met my father so that would be a bitch to see him for the first time and have him ruin my wedding.
  Khrista gigglebear520 [15 Mar 2005]
• Your new husband tells his new grandparents about the bed straps he just bought for the honeymoon.
  Heather Cummings [16 Mar 2005]
• Dads: You say you'll pay for the wedding, then find your daughter is marrying the son of Bill Gates.
  Drumstick Master [17 Mar 2005]
• When you're walking down the aisle, you trip and rip your skirt off, revealing the giant panties you had to wear because the rest had stains on.
  Little Fish [19 Mar 2005]
• You're engaged to Bill Gates' son.
  Capt Nemo [23 Mar 2005]
• You are heavily drunk, wearing jeans, and are getting married to a childhood friend.
  (Britney Spears, here's looking at ya.)
  Matthew Strahan [23 Mar 2005]
• The gas station's out of rubbers
  Chris Kurai-Sama [31 Mar 2005]
• After getting married and then divorced, you are still legally brother and sister. Darn!
  Choobaka Plankton [31 Mar 2005]
• You ate so many sweet potatoes and beans just before the ceremony that as you say "I do", you fart such a stinker that everyone witnessing your wedding dies, faints or enters into coma. As you try to give CPR to your wife/husband(-to-be), she/he breathes her/his last and whispers, "Dont you dare remarry or else I will not let you off when I become a ghost..."
  Isaiah Khoo [31 Mar 2005]
• Your father-in-law to be catches you 'dancing' with a chicken in the bathroom before the ceremony.
  Troy Worman [4 Apr 2005]
• Your father-in-law to be catches you 'dancing' with a chicken in the bathroom before the ceremony
  Capt Nemo [5 Apr 2005]
• As the minister was stating our vow to repeat, I replied "What did you say?"
  J M [5 Apr 2005]
• We had a traditional Anglican white wedding - church and all. My wife loves the language of the King James bible, so we asked the wedding ceremony to use this version - only my wife didn't realise the catch.
  As the minister asked "Do you, Louise, promise to love, honour and obey?", instead of "I do.", we received from Louise "and Obey!!????"
  Well, the whole church just cracked up.
  Big Al [5 Apr 2005]
• You wake up sober the next morning and find that your bride is about sixty years older than you thought.
  sinister minister [6 Apr 2005]
• You come out of the bathroom on your wedding night, and your room is full of cops, and your bride is holding a badge in one hand and your stash in the other.
  sinister minister [6 Apr 2005]
• Charles postponed his wedding until Saturday so he can attend the funeral of Pope John Paul II on Friday. Bummer, to have to go to a funeral two days in a row.
  sinister minister [6 Apr 2005]
• You realise you're the star of a new movie, Camilla: Queen of the Desert.
  Silent Dan [8 Apr 2005]
• The minister is so drunk he accidentally marries your partner... then weds you to the brides father
  Little Al [9 Apr 2005]
• You're a naiive young, 22-year-old bride, who met and fell in love with your groom in a chatroom at www.msn.com. Needless to say, you will always remember the exact moment that the fibres of your heart shred, as you walk down the isle and clap eyes upon your 60 year-old groom.
  Goldfish Poodle Boy [9 Apr 2005]
• You realize you won't be getting any because your husband is passed out from drinking seven bottles of cheap champagne.
  Jane Doe [9 Apr 2005]
• The church is double-booked, and your bride starts making out with the other guy
  jim punny [10 Apr 2005]
• Not only do half your friends not show up (and don't send gifts either) but then your parents pretend they thought you were paying for the reception.
  Earl of Wessex [11 Apr 2005]
• As the bridal march begins, so does your IBS.
  Jacob Mohr [11 Apr 2005]
• The church catches on fire and your husband falls madly in love with the fire chief.
  Louise Chapman [13 Apr 2005]
• You forget your wedding dress at home and your maid of honor doesnt show up because she died in a car crash. :((
  Rach Dabney [15 Apr 2005]
• You're engaged to Alf. But it could be worse, it could be ET. Or it could be worse still, it could be Steven Spielberg
  Goldfish Poodle Boy [16 Apr 2005]
• You kill a man and receive life sentence and are never released to your love.
  Byorn Jorn [17 Apr 2005]
• You find out just before you get married that your new father/mother-in-law is your ex. This could get ugly.
  Agentguy The Sheep [18 Apr 2005]
• You notice that your bride can take a piss while STANDING!
  Sebastian Weing [22 Apr 2005]
• When the minister says "Do you...?', you hear a large number of shotguns being cocked.
  michael rolfe [23 Apr 2005]
• When your bride to be is only interested in one thing, and that is the cake in the corner!!!
  katapilla sharpido [25 Apr 2005]
• Discovering that "he" was a "she". Happened to a friend of mine.
  Ned Tyler [26 Apr 2005]
• When you put the ring somewhere REALLY safe and you got so excited thinking about the honeymoon, it won't come off.
  mantlebrott bits [6 May 2005]
• When the vows include "Love, honour and obey" - and your wife-to-be says "OBEY?!"
  Silent Dan [12 May 2005]
• I got maried four weeks ago, and at four in the morning I was driven for an hour in to hospital with gastro got released two hours before the wedding. Drove another hour to the ceremony place vomiting and diahorreah up until two minutes before my wife came down the aisle. I got through the ceremony, then had to be carried to the toilet. Then my wife and I had a trip to hospital to get another needle then had our reception. I held out till 10:30, then retired to the hotel room with not enough strength to walk let alone carry my new wife over the threshold. I was going to consumate the marrige, but our bridal party and the mother-in-law didnt leave until 1 am, by which time I had passed out on the bed. But the worst thing is I had to pay $45 for a piece of dry toast, which I threw up anyway. Hope someone finds it funny.
  david brow [23 May 2005]
• When the gorgeous young blonde babe with the party balloon chest puppies who works evenings, that you've had a 2 week whirlwind romance with, which suddenly turns into a wedding..... turns up at the bucks night as the stripper! (Whew!)
  mantlebrott bits [27 May 2005]
• When the bride comes down the aisle you get an erection. You turn round to hide it, and knock out the vicar.
  david arnold [28 May 2005]
• During your wedding you realise you have the same parents.
  martin scarbrough [11 Jun 2005]
• She doesnt turn up, so you end up marrying the very old organist to save face.
  martin scarbrough [11 Jun 2005]
• Your bride tricks you into marrying her twin sister, who smells a lot like cheese.
  martin scarbrough [11 Jun 2005]
• You strain your groin muscle carrying your bride over the threshold
  Lazlo Andrews [16 Jun 2005]
• You realise you very drunk and your bride is a small farmyard animal.
  martin scarbrough [23 Jun 2005]
• You realise your very drunk and your bride is a small farmyard animal (and you fancy her sister)
  martin scarbrough [23 Jun 2005]
• You realise your freinds have spiked your drink with Viagra. Your new mother in law insists on the first dance.
  martin scarbrough [23 Jun 2005]
• Your bride insists on wearing a t-shirt saying "I'm with stupid", then insists on having her photo taken with all your family
  martin scarbrough [23 Jun 2005]
• Your friends show a homemade film at your wedding reception showing just how close you were to your old girlfriend.
  martin scarbrough [23 Jun 2005]
• You realise what true happiness really, is but by then it is too late.
  martin scarbrough [23 Jun 2005]
• Wormholes - Either one of you saying "I do" causes a freak wormhole that summons up a meteorite heading for the cheap chapel, and your bride turns into the Elephant Man moments before the meteorite crushes you, so the last thing you think is "Man, she is UGLY!, And I married her. Fu...."
  Nielsen [25 Jun 2005]
• Your partner's mobile rings and it is a bride from another wedding asking were he is.
  ED M [27 Jun 2005]
• You wake up in the next morning finding out you are now "Mr Paris Hilton" along with Fred Durst, that wanker from the Backstreet Boys and Rick Salomon.
  Sean Andrew [6 Jul 2005]
• At the bridal suite, you finally realise why your wife has such a low voice...
  KiLLeR_TeD [8 Jul 2005]
• You start mentally undressing the minister, then realise you weren't doing it mentally.
  melon mels [10 Jul 2005]
• You find you've turned up to a goth's birthday party, as a bride, and they are looking for virgin to sacrifice to the devil.
  Fred Jones [12 Jul 2005]
• I said, "I do", she said, "I guess".
  Mike E [13 Jul 2005]
• Your mum dies in the morning.
  Geoff Jones [14 Jul 2005]
• Her bulge is showing when she grabs your hand, and you realise you have been constantly drunk for the past few years
  Possom [21 Jul 2005]
• Your current wife turns up uninvited
  mantelbrott set [29 Jul 2005]
• Almost made it! But half way through the vows....you give birth.
  mantelbrott set [29 Jul 2005]
• You recognise the priest who is performing the service as the one who abused you as a choirboy and you now realise how good looking he is.
  Cyn Icle [11 Aug 2005]
• You wear the most gorgeous white dress ever to your wedding only to find that your period has started a week early.
  haruka chan ^_^ [13 Aug 2005]
• At the reception, the bride wins the three legged race, and she didn't need a partner.
  mantelbrott set [14 Aug 2005]
• When the preacher asks if there is any reason this couple should not wed, you forget to raise your hand.
  Mike Smith [18 Aug 2005]
• Your girlfriend wont have sex outside of marriage so, believing her to be a virgin, you propose. After the wedding, her father says to you "I hope you last longer than the other three."
  Richie [26 Aug 2005]
• She walks down the aisle with her dad, resplendent in white lace. When they arrive at the altar you realize where you've seen her dad before: he run out on your mom when you were a kid.
  mantelbrott set [18 Sep 2005]
• When she kneels at the altar in the "Gone with the Wind"-style hooped wedding gown, and the congregation gets to admire her new Brazillian before you do. To make matters even worse, the first lady in the front row immediately has a stroke, the second lady has a stroke, and the third lady can't reach.
  funnybonesup [27 Sep 2005]
• the vicar accidentally brings a harry potter book instead of the bible.
  david arnold [8 Oct 2005]
• Instead of "I do" your intended barks.
  HellPhyre 00pi [8 Oct 2005]
• When the priest asks if there are any objections, someone in the back of the room reminds your intended that he/she is still a monk/nun.
  HellPhyre 00pi [16 Oct 2005]
• On the wedding night, you wrestle for twenty minutes to get the teddy, stockings and suspenders off her, then finally give up and go get the shearing outfit.
  Kiwi Kivin [20 Oct 2005]
• You realize that your bride is actually your brother. "Whoops, sorry, l'il bro, at least they support gay marriages!"
  Meddle Amereddles [14 Nov 2005]
• You married a mail order bride named Kelly. You go to the airport to pick her up and find out your new bride is your new groom.
  Smiley [30 Nov 2006]
• Before you say 'I do', the bride wants you to meet her boyfriend
  felicia daniel [23 Dec 2006]
• You fart while you say "I do". And it stinks bad.
  Rajat . [26 May 2008]

What's your worst thing?

What do you think is the worst thing that could happen on your wedding day?